We’re conditioned to speak well of the dead. When a California university professor criticized a former first lady upon her death, an outraged nation struck back. Exceptions to the rule are allowed for dictators, drug-addled rock stars, or exploitive mothers – people so obviously broken, their dysfunction becomes their legacy. But for the most part, … Continue reading Speaking ill of the dead →

Longing is a unique feeling. For me it includes aching in my stomach, tingling in my upper sinuses, a catch in my heart, and high shallow breathing. Longing shows up in grief after loss, homesickness, and regret. I grieved after the abuser killed himself. Despite his brutal abuse, I still longed for the person I … Continue reading Lessons from longing →